Limerence

In love, the process of crystallization consists of 4 steps:
First, the process of admiration, which speaks of being in awe with qualities of the loved one.
Second, the process of acknowledgement of one’s own glee in gaining the loved one’s interest.
Third, one’s hope while envisioning being the love of the loved one.
Finally, the last step: the delight in which one take pleasure in in overrating the beauty and merit of the person whose love one hopes to obtain. (Standhal 1822,One Love)

In 1977, the psychologist Dorothy Tennov, explained this same process on a pathological level as being: limerence. A process by which one obsesses over the need for ones feelings to be reciprocated

“Limerence develops and is sustained when there is a certain balance of hope and uncertainty. The base for limerent hope is not in objective reality but reality as it is perceived. The inclination is to sift through nuances of speech and subtleties of behavior for evidence of limerent hope. ‘Lovers, of course, are notoriously frantic epistemologists, second only to paranoiacs (and analysts) as readers of signs and wonders.’^[16] ”Little things” are noticed and endlessly analyzed for meaning. Such excessive concern over trivia may not be entirely unfounded, however. Body language can indicate a return of feeling. What the limerent object said and did is recalled with vividness. Alternative meanings of those behaviors recalled are searched out… Limerent fantasy is unsatisfactory unless rooted in reality, because the fantasizer may want the fantasy to seem realistic and somewhat possible.”